First Aid Kit for Strong Emotions, e.g. Overwhelm

Created 2024/04/04 · Updated 2024/08/14 Epistemology life Confidence high, try it and see! :D Shortlink bit.ly/corgihelp

Silver bullets

For gaining clarity before or after any intense situation or decision:

Slow (breathing, talking)
Sense: scan your face, shoulders, throat, chest, and stomach. Notice tension, temperature, heaviness, constriction.
Name the physical sensations. Notice and let pass: emotions, thoughts, stories.
Choose: act with intention.

Try these:

Physiological sigh
- Two consecutive inhales through the nose: a deep breath followed by a shorter, sharp breath
- followed by a long, slow exhale through the mouth
- Repeat 1–3×
Alternate nostril breathing
- Sit comfortably.
- Use your right thumb to close the right nostril and inhale through the left.
- Then use your ring finger to close the left nostril and exhale through the right.
- Inhale right, then exhale left.
- Repeat 3×
Voo-hum breathing
- Voo breathing (foghorn): take a deep belly breath, then exhale slowly while making a low-pitched, vibrating “voooooo” sound from the belly, like a foghorn. Do 3×.
- Hum breathing: take a deep belly breath, then exhale with a “hum” sound. Do 3×.

Engineer procedures: see Lower Neuroticism: Engineer Procedures
Depression / anxiety
- Grounding (5 see, 4 hear, 3 feel, 2 smell, 1 taste)
- Emotional release: shake it out!
- Tony Robbins UPW 2023 exercise (40 min)
Overwhelm
- Art of Accomplishment episode on overwhelm: “What’s actually happening on an emotional level is there are all these big emotions and you are not feeling them. You are not allowing them to pass all the way through you, so your system is overwhelmed with the amount of emotions you have.”
- Identify the emotions, isolate them, and let each pass through you.
DBT
- STOP: Stop (freeze completely), Take a step back, Observe, Proceed mindfully.
- Opposite action: do the opposite of what the emotion suggests.

Lack of motivation → meditate → Circle of Excellence
Anxiety → say “I’m excited!” out loud 10 times (with arm motions!)
- Deeper: identify what you’re excited about in the situation (e.g. a growth opportunity, a new perspective), and say “I’m excited” 10 times after each reason!
- How it works: anxiety and excitement share neural circuits.
- Source: Art of Accomplishment (Joe Hudson) workshop “Embracing Intensity”.
Fatigue → how to feel energized instantly
- Swing your arms together (parallel to the ground) into a quick clap, 10×.
- Bonus points if you also look upward and smile as widely as you can.
Fear
- Emotional access: savor the fear.
- Emotional release: literally lie on the floor and shake.
- To listen: 7 Powerful Questions to Stopping Fear and Anxiety
Shame → find a quiet place and cry, or book an ecstatic dance
Guilt → add specificity to the guilt, then evolve the guilt
Anger → create a container for it to happen (dissipate, not vent)
Apathy → review getting more done, faster

Shock (not anticipated, a sense of denial) → get back into your body, breathe
Sadness / depression → a totally normal signal
Longing → say “this is part of it”
Rumination → let it pass

Urge surfing: a technique from addiction counseling for processing impulses.
- E.g. the impulse to grab a snack, check my phone, or stare at the wall.
- Feel the urge, be present with it, hold space, breathe.
- Like a wave, the urge will intensify at first. Eventually it will peak, and eventually it will dissipate.
Eugene Gendlin’s Focusing
- Classic six steps: 1 Clearing a space · 2 Felt sense · 3 Handle · 4 Resonating · 5 Asking · 6 Receiving
- Guided: the Focusing audiobook
Core Transformation: an overview

Resolve cycles: ten minutes to unblock yourself.
1. Write down your problem.
2. Set a timer for five minutes and stream-of-consciousness the solution.
3. Set a timer for five minutes, identify the action item, and execute.